Sunday, January 10, 2010

Thank You

This blog is a Thank You letter to the one person (besides Jesus lol) that was there for me come rain or shine. So Thank you, for taking off work all those times I was sick to take care of me and take me to the doctor. Thank You for introducing me to music, and then supporting me when I decided to get involved in it. Thank You for keeping me in check when I THOUGHT I was grown! Thank you for reminding me that when you ASKED me to do something, it really wasn't an option! LOL Thank you for introducing me to Jesus and teaching me to walk with him on this journey of life. Thank you for telling me that you're proud of me. Thank you for caring enough to know my likes and dislikes. Thank you for pushing me to do the best I could. Thank you for taking time out of your day to ask me how I was doing. Thank you for always understanding me. Thank you for trusting me to do the right thing. Thank you for never giving up on me...ever. Thank you for always listening to me. Thank you for always having a shoulder for me to cry on. Thank you for ALWAYS believing in me. Thank you for teaching me how to cook! Thank you for teaching me the harsh lessons of life and how to brace myself when I am confronted with them. Thank you for never hesitating to put me first. Thank you for so many beautiful holiday seasons. Thank you for protecting and providing for me. Thank you for snapping me out of brat mode! HAHA Thank you for being stern and teaching me how to stand up for myself. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. Thank you for teaching me how to love. Thank you for being a wonderful person inside and out. And most of all...

THANK YOU, for being MY mother!

You will NEVER be forgotten and I am still proud of you!

Your daughter, Amber

Friday, January 8, 2010

It is what it is

Today was A LOT better than help from my "friends" though. I was listening to the hold your dreams song from the movie fame, and I really got excited! Excited because I can finally move on, I can finally start doing things for me. My whole life I have put my friends, my family, my work, really everything before myself, but that today! I have helped friends out only to get ignored when I need them most. I have listened to many problems and honestly tried to help the situations, and no love is returned...ehh #kanyeshrug, it's what the secular do. I can only imagine how Jesus feels! But i'm not mad...not at all, instead I'll continue to be always, because honestly, I don't have the heart to ignore my friends, or the energy to fight it. It's like my mom always said...pick your friends wisely, backstabbers come in all forms.

Peace ♥ and LOL

Cherish the Moment

The Lord is really testing me right now. Everyday of my life is a constant struggle to deal with my mother's death. I'd give up every dime and possession I had to just say hello to her, but unfortunately I can't. I'm definitely walking through a rough patch in life right now, and it's getting overwhelming. This feeling of abandonment i'm feeling is a heavy load to bear. Those of you that know me know that I'm always laughing and joking around and it really is genuine, but there's some people throwing some sharp daggers in my happiness right now. I have a lot to be proud of myself for, I'm a college grad, I have a job(Amen), and I have some amazing friends, but I feel so disconnected from my family sometimes that it's hard. And maybe that's my fault. The two people that raised me are 6 feet in the ground. Maybe I'm scared to let people in too deep for fear that I might lose them too. One thing I know for sure is that my eyes stay on God, and this "rough" patch I'm going through will pass! There's a song by the cheetah girls,(lame I know haha), called "Cherish the Moment" and the chrous goes, "Cherish the moment, live for today. We all get lost, just don't lose your way. We all love the sun but we still need the rain, so what good is it too complain, It don't change a thing." So with that, I'll take these hard times and use them as another rung in my ladder on my way to the top! :)

I feel a lot better haha

Peace, ♥ and sooooouuulll